Except it's not one long big live action or cinematic movie. It's several shorts in almost all anime format and style and was sanctioned by the Bungie studios. So you know at least they had a hand in it somehow and it's similar to the Animatrix that came out acouple of years ago and it even begins in a similiar way where both movies have an introduction to the entire back story of their respective universes with disgusting amounts of detail that fanboys and scholars love (and there is a correlation between the two). And just like the Animatrix, it has several different stories of various characters that don't really have much to do with the main story. So here's the first.
Origins
It begins after the ending of Halo 3 where if you're a cool gamer and not a lame PS3 player, you know that Master Chief and Cortana are floating out there in space as half of their ship has been cut in half by a slip space jump and are left floating out there with nothing to do except narrate about the entire history of the past thousand years and the entire story from Halo to Halo 3. Also she waxes poetic about the nature of man and existence but you know women...blah blah blah. So it brings you up to full speed on everything. Again, if you really love Halo, it's awesome. If you're not really into it and just into shooting people, then it's boring. I personally was looking at digital ghost boobs of Cortana. It's great because it sounds like they used the original actress from the game for Cortana's voice or a voice actress of equal sound and skill. At first seems Pee Wee Herman weird to break up the stories but it makes sense when you think about how it's two different stories and such should be bookended by their respective eras even though I think it's kinda insulting to the audience. Then again they do know the American education system and Japan DOES love to drag things on (stupid Dragon Ball Z with it's eighty episodes of powering up). The animation is cool and anime. I mean it's nothing spectacularly great but it does the job quite well.
The Duel
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| Eirian |
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| But Patty, it's not my fault I got a PS3 |
No one wants to be the Arbiter. Everyone wants to be a Spartan or an ODST. Being the Arbiter is like dating a hot girls less hotter sister so that you can get to the hot sister in time. But this story is an interesting samurai story take on how the position of Arbiter came to being and how it was once regarded as a holy position before the Prophets came into power and the Elites in this even wear a Japanese type robe when they're not in armor. It's so a tragic samurai epic anime complete with the killing of a milllion enemies that can't shoot for shit (the fucking tank can't even touch him) while the Arbiter slices and dices everyone with his swords. His fucking motherfucking cock slicing swords against a ton of guns and tanks. Then his wife is killed and he faces agianst another elite with a sword and guess what? Classic slicing and the wait for it moment where blood splotches out like a hydrant since every character in anime, has at least a gallon of blood in them. Seriously, it's an interesting take on the Covenant and I like learning about the other side but the problem is that it falls into cliche. The story isn't strong enough to carry it through nor are the characters deep enough to make it interesting enough but the visuals are quite stunning. However, not stunning enough to make you care.The Prototype
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| I believe I can fllllyyyy |
Want more Japanese emo-ism? Well wait till you get a load of The Prototype. It stars an emo soldier nicknamed Ghost who's the only survivor of his platoon which he commanded and lead into slaughter. How? We don't know. Why? Not important. How'd he survive without injury? Super naturalism. So we cut between flashbacks of the dying soldier in his arms asking him to feel and be human because he's considered a Ghost because he has no feelings about anything, which means he's a guy, and the current battle over a testing ground for a Spartan heavy assault armor with big fucking guns and a ton of missles. Hey, one thing the Japanese can do it's big robots. The art is typical anime fair again much like the Origin short but this does have a ton of more action with lots and lots of explosions. I mean alot. It even has some gory alien guys exploding which is always cool. Prototype is probably best viewed with the sound off or the dialogue gone or on another language since you can put your own words to the story, just like I do whenever my old boss would talk to me. And of course he stays to fight when it would've been easier to run.
The Babysitter
Fear the ODST. The Covenant know of the fighting prowess of the special forces known as the Helljumpers. See there perfect foofy hair and big eyes which make them either decesnded from Lupin the 3rd or Cowboy Bebop. Aside from the whole femmy hair popstar boy band look, this is actually a descent story just with anime to it. It's of course about the ODST special forces marines on a secret mission to kill a Prophet but with a Spartan as the sniper. And it goes so beautifully and delightfully according to plan where the heroes kill the bad guys, quip funny and no one dies or gets hurt cause every war film and combat situation seems to dictate this logic. Pssshhhhh....yea right. So it basically all goes to shit in a handbasket full of grenades near a fan. However you get to see the rivalry between the ODST's and the Spartans and how the relationship in this story leads to a budding respect of the abilities of the other. I'd say the style of the story telling is much like Shinichio Watanabe (geshuntite!). Yes I know I misspelled it all but you are Canadian if you care about such a thing. So is it emo? No. Well kinda is but not in the whiney way. More like the casualties of war way. But a plus is that you get to see Dutch from the ODST game in here.
Odd One Out
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| Damn. Cookie Monster got big since he went to prison |
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| Look!! POKEMON!!!! |
Homecoming
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| You two share....or else... |
It's a bit really weird to watch. Let me tell you, it's hard to watch a tough and gritty war drama when all the soldiers look like this:
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| "Don't look behind you now but I think Jake is fucking that tree" |
There is a ton of guns and action and alien splattering with the typical war bravado but again, the Japanese emo-ism runs rampant in this. I like the story and it's similar to the short story Pariah in the Halo novels about the kids who want to go home in the Spartan program but again it's a ton of eye zooms, near tears and sing songy flowy language. Terrible? No. Watchable? For the most part. So apparently the other half of the Spartan II project is to guilt the covenant into surrender with puppy dog eyes.
The Package
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| EVERYBODY!! I HAVE TO PEE AND THEY DIDN'T BUILD A ZIPPER INTO THE SUIT!! |
Outside of the pornographic title, this story is just like the Animatrix where the best story is the one that's computerized. If you just watch one story from this DVD, watch this. It's really fantastically amazing although it does have the Japanese look to the characters, especially in Dr. Halsey. It can be overlooked for the most part but the part that's hardest to overlook, Master Chief's voice is changed to a much gruffer one. Not the smooth gruffess that makes you want to croon in his arms like a drink of warm brandy but the type of battle grizzled vet that makes your grandaddy's war stories seem like fairy tales. Ahh...I miss pappy and his stories before bed time :) So the story is you watch Master Chief and the other Spartans fly around in cool X-Wing type space bikes and try to rescue Dr. Halsey from Covenant hands. Again the computer animation is amazingly breathtaking and made with amazing attention to detail while the other cool thing: You get to see the Spartans faces. Not the big guys but you can see every other Spartan from Fred to Kelly and even see the Spartan III armor in action. It's a big plus if you read the books and has really awesomely great action in it. Cartoony action? Yes. I demand realistic action to my fictional giant cybord stories!!! Seriously, it's good though. The action is fun, fast paced and plays out alot like the magic that made the first Halo game so much fun in the crazy, skin of your teeth kind of way.
So final verdict?
Overall 3/5
It's a mixed bag. Some of the stories work. Some don't. It's just too weird of a hybrid in the styles but there is some hope to it. Honestly I'd like to see Bungie make another DVD of animated shorts but with less anime. A lot less anime. It wasn't too bad in Batman: Gotham Knight and much better in the stylized world of the Animatrix but the Haloverse doens't really need much anime. It works for one or two stories but not the entire span of the DVD. Still it is an interesting experiment so a must view for Halo fans and a passing fancy for the casual fan and a must for anime fans. So not everything should be anime because you get something like this:
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